Fathers.....

Although I remembered my mother, I only had a picture of my father in my mind from the first and last time she showed me- I never knew him,  and still haven't met him... After everything I've experienced, I'd only want to see him so I can see the other half of where I came from, and to show him what he missed out on. Growing up though, the closest father figure my sister and I had was my Uncle Tony in San Francisco. No matter the distance, he was always a phone call away and we're extremely close. 

Now that I'm a mother of one, I'm elated at the fact that my daughter and her father (David) have a special connection and he takes care of her above and beyond the call of duty. No matter what happens in life or how old she gets, this is the kind of experience she'll remember for a lifetime. To be honest, I've  learned a great deal of life lessons from  Dave that I should've learned from my parents...   
Through this, the void my father left in me is filled, and appreciating my child's father everyday besides Father's day is a must- good men are rare these days! It's unfortunate, however, that some women don't share this view.

In a past conversation, I was told that Men (especially Black men) feel it's mostly Black women who don't appreciate good men who show and prove their worth and weight constantly. What they get in return is a flimsy "thanks" (maybe), negative energy and disregard, especially when they can't provide everything that's being asked of them or make a mistake (I.e., "you [men] ain't $h@!). Yet when these guys need support or a favor that results in a positive outcome (esp. For the kids sake) the women don't come thru and/or refuse to help....putting a "convenient excuse" in front of their actions so it "makes sense"! WHY?! I can only imagine the challenges of being a man who provides and protects on a daily basis, and our Black men face so much more adversity and stress in this world.... How do these women forget that the one person that they look to for comfort and strength is his woman?!  

When will they open their eyes and give more honor and respect to the men who are REAL MEN to their families and great fathers to their children? Even when the parents separate, there are dads that still want to be apart of their children's lives to the fullest extent!! Why do THESE men get played to the left, disregarded, downplayed, and taken for granted instead of the cheaters, abusers, deadbeat dads who leave their families behind, no call/no show on the kids, and don't look back?
This behavior coming from any woman is appalling....but being a Black woman myself and seeing our black women do this makes me sick! Then I hear these same women complaining with negative attitudes and wondering where all "the good men" went... Into hiding, maybe?!  

Ladies, why is it that you can only call on "good dad/man" when you need money, talk about your drama, or when the kids are out of control? Why not call them to see how they're doing, to spend time with the kids, or just build a positive bond with them? If kids are involved, think about how much it would benefit them to see and feel that positive bond between their parents, no matter the situation! 

Make your mistakes, and go through your ups and downs, but always appreciate, support, and respect the good men, fathers and friends that they are... Don't just start on Fathers Day, start today and everyday thereafter.